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Sunday, August 27, 2006

No.


I was trying to find a Display Picture that encapsuates me. Try as hard as I might, I couldn't. I experimented with one of Marlon Brando from "A Streetcar Named Desire", but the sad fact is that I just don't ooze with raw sexuality as he does.
And then I found this utterly amazing Nancy Panel that is, oh, so true of me.
It shows Sluggo floating in the air and saying "No" to the world.
ME...

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

My romance doesn't need a thing but a reason (...to finally fade away)

I had promised romance (and psychiatric hospitals) in the first post, so here they are.

It was a strange sort of relationship. Long distance. But not exactly an open relationship because, well, we didn't try to date other people during it; at least I didn't- was having enough trouble maintaining this one. So, we called it the "No titles, non derivative," relationship, released of course in the Beta phase (exactly like our dear role model- Google). It was designed in such a way that both of us try it and come off it anytime we liked. But were we, or rather, was I emotionally detached?

I wish.
But I was almost prepared for it, in a way that I wasn't for my previous relationships, okay, relationship. Largely due to this epiphany I had while talking to a friend. (I've had too few... epiphanies I mean, not friends)
He had just split up with someone and feeling very suicidal; into drugs and alcohol and all that good stuff. He had to be hospitalized. I met him there.

"God. I cannot sleep." he said "Like when I close my eyes I see her"
"I can relate." I say "But do you think she thinks of you ever? Has she even called since you've been here?"
"um no"
"Why then should you do it?"
"She must be busy or something." He said (Phew these people)
"Listen mate. You were going to kill yourself for her. If she's too busy to care, I think you should rethink your priorities. "

I am a natural therapist. People just come up to me and start telling me their troubles. And I give them excellent advice. Only problem. I don't follow them myself. This time I listened to what I was saying. Wait, all this is familar. I have been there. Not to the extent of killing myself, certainly. But taking myself too seriously in this relationship that wasn't headed anywhere- from the very beginning. Yep that's me.

She's an excellent person and great fun to be with. However I treasure her more as a friend than a ... yeah I'm rationalizing.


I still to grapple with the why question though. The excuse reason that she gave me was just too frivolous and lame. The previous day I had talked to her on the phone; something we do rarely. Maybe I turned out to be too stupid for her. Or maybe it was my penchant for knock-knock jokes. Perhaps I shared too many of them. Or maybe it was my guitar playing, it must've been too cheesy for her. Or perhaps it was the fact that she's going to this über-cool American University (albeit not very close to me), and she didn't want a long-distance relationship lugging her when she could be meeting other über-cool guys. What I'm trying to understand is of course the meaning of it all and I've subscribed to a half-baked notion that is a combination of all the above factors. Healing is on its way.

I'm like the guy who always comes before the perfect guy (*hint* *hint*). So I hope she'll be happy with Him. Oh, wait. That is the point of the perfect guy right? I hope He will be happy with her... which is more doubtful. (Tongue firmly in cheek)


"If she's gone, I can't go on,
Feeling two foot small...
Hey you got to hide your love away."
-The Beatles
(my ultimate guide to all things amoristic)

Monday, August 21, 2006

It's magic...

Google is such a wonderful conversation opener. It does these great things that leave you gasping. When Google released spreadsheets, an excel like application, which can be accessed through the internet. It was just a beginning to what could be done through the internet. Now Google has released Writely, a similar application that works like Word. Well released is not the word because Writely was independently developed, the best part is that Google now provides them with the required server space. Both these can be accessed remotely, i.e from anywhere on the planet with an internet connection. The best part, you can allow others to edit your documents- in real time.
Internet is all about magic. There are days when I'm tired of seeing the same things over and over again. And then there are days where I find tremendous amounts of magical stuff just strewn around. Librarything is one of those utterly simple yet powerful tools you find around on the internet. It is a book catalog site. Personally, the bookcase of any home is what attracts me. So here's a site that allows you to do just that. Online.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Audio message

Here’s a diatribe speech of a Harvard Psychology professor. It is hilarious, interesting and informative. You must listen to it if you can shell out 50 minutes. And it is invitingly titled “How to Do Precisely the Right Thing at All Possible Times”.

Quick Tip: you can right-click, choose save target as- save it onto your computer transfer it to your iPod or mp3 player and listen while on the move if you choose to.

Audio Link